I have always been in control.
Driving is when no one questions me, bothers me, I am alone with gravel roads and fading headlights in the dark.
I wasn’t alone last night, and I don’t know if that makes it safer or scarier.
A missed corner in a thunderstorm, a deep ditch, rain and rain and more rain pelting the roof. Three inches away from a light pole. Three. Inches.
Between needing a tow and needing an ambulance.
I’m scared for the “what if’s” that couldn’t occurred if I had been alone.
I’m scared I wouldn’t have pulled the wheel the way that I did. The hood would’ve crumpled, and I would be more than just stuck.
I talk about dying an awful lot for someone who wants to live.
I remember staring through the pouring rain at those street signs.
At how close I was to where I never want to be.